ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
