Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
