this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
