if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
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