I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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