Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize