Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
