just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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