I wannas sexs uuuuu
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
