you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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