I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
