I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
