How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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