I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
