Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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