I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
