Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
