so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
