She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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