9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
