We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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