We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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