Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
