Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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