is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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