hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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