Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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