Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
