so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
