We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Girls should come with a carfax report
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Randomize
