Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
