Moan for me like Helen Keller
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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