i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
