im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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