So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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