its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
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