I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
