so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
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I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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