i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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