If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
