apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
