there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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