Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize