I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
