She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
