Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
