i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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