I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
