I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
i need some magic done to my vagina
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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