I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
